Sakitnya , Hanya Tuhan Saja Yang Tahu

Margareth Tengah PotPetPotPet  Dengarlah rintihan aku yer ... :P

Hoo ~ Aku tak henti-henti posting pasal feeling ni kan ? Menyampah tak ? Hak3 ! Nak buat macam mane ... Now , just kat blog aku je lah aku luahkan perasaan aku ni . Oke :) Law rase menyampah sangat nak bace , so tak yah lah bace . Aku tak suruh pun . Just ignoring it oke . Fine =.= . Maafkan  . Now mase aku nak post entry ni , mood aku tak berapa baik sangat . Hormon aku entah berkeliaran pergi ke mane entah . Hilang sekejap . Soriiii ... Not in a good mood actually .


Okes . Bila kita mencintai seseorang . Di mata kita hanya lah dia . Just only him right ? Yesh . That's the truth . Only him . Semua tentang dia indah-indah belaka . He's the best for us . He's the apple of my pie . He's the straw to my berry . He's my world . He's my angle . He's my everything ( Mase tu tengah hangat lagi cuz die layan ) . Now semua nya tak serupa bikin . Sakit . Kita yang mencintai ni lah yang terpaksa menanggung bebanan seberat itu . Macam-macamlah yang kita fikir kan . Oke . He's not for me . He's not loving me . He's maybe got someone that love him more than i am . Maybe I'm not good enough for him . What have I did until he treat me like this way ? Macam-macamlah . Seribu satu bercampur menjadi satu . Yup . Now that's what I feel . So despressed ! Kalaulah orang itu dapat tahu , mendengar dan mengerti apa yang aku alami sekarang . Kan bagus . Tapi mustahil . Manusia . Where got such kind of supernatural ? Lolss ~ Hurm .


Aku menunggu dengan sabar . Entah lah . Why . Macam perasaan aku terhadap Konrad dulu . Minat kat dia separuh mati . Then dia pula layan . Makin naya lah . Walaupun masa tu me and Kon just be a scandal jew . Tapi , honest . He's a good scandal at all . Haha ~ Ngek ! Mestilah .. Mulut manis macam Kon tu kan . Kuikui *sori Kon* . Dah putus tu . Lama gak aku sengsara . Almost 2 years tak dapat lupakan Kon . Serious . Tu lah aku heran . Naper kalau kita minat kat orang tu , perasaannya lebih kuat berbanding dengan perasaan kalau kita suka kat orang tu . Minat memang berbeza daripada suka . I think . And perkara tu , berulang lagi . Now not wif Kon , but wif someone else . Entahlah . Terlalu kuat kot . Daripada minat . Turn to sayang . Turn to Cinta . Yesh ! That's what I feel now . It's very strong . Huh ~ itu yang membuatkan aku "sakit" sekarang ni . :(


Dah tak mesra seperti dulu lagi dah . Entah . Di mana silapnya . Me or him . Both ? How should i noe . Aku tak tahu . got no reason for that . I want just pretend nothing happen . But can I ? Goshh ~ It's a hard task actually .


* " Do take care taw " . " Don't be so noty2 " . " Jalan leklok " . " Jage diri leklok " . Banyak lagi lah sweet words from him . I do miss all of that things . Feeling so empty now . :( Tak suke keadaan macam ni . Kan bagus kalau kita leh erase perkara-perkara yang kita tak suke . Macam word tu . We can erasing everything that we don't like . Just keep the thing that we like only . Kan bahagia . Huh ~


Sometimes I did think that .. Apa nak kesah kan . He's not totally mine . We're never ever declared . Batasan between me and him is Papa and Mama . That's all . Teman tapi mesra . Nothing more than that . But izit really like that ? Confuse . It's a damn confusing . Can't make me think properly . Hurm . Just feeling so empty without him . Thats all . Hope i can make my day and get thru into it . :(