Malam Pra-Graduasi Pendidikan Kemahiran Hidup Sesi 08/09 Universiti Pendidikan Sultan Idris

Tarikh : 29 - 30hb Oktober 2011

Hari : Sabtu & Ahad

Tempat : Casa Rachardo Resort , Port Dickson

Ellow hai hai there .. Lame dah kot Yett tak update blog ni . Berhabuk dah hah . *hachhiiuuu!* . Fuhh . Maaf lah ye , kinda busy since pergi praktikum semester lepas . Tu yang jarang sangat nak update blog ni . Windu kat Yett tak ? Takkkk ?? Alamak , cedeyh ar nie . Haha .. Kidding . ;)

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My Heart is Crying

He's the one can make me forget about someone . That's why I accept him . I try . Pernah cakap before ni , I'm scared of accept anyone . Because my heart still belonging to someone . But I try so hard . And it's work . He'd took my heart slowly . Yes he is . But now , entah di mana silap dan salah nya hubungan ni . Semuanya tak seperti yang disangkakan . 

Before this pernah berlaku macam ni . Yes , masa dengan Awie dulu . He's not be by myside when I need him most . Bila aku tanya , senyap je . Suka menyepikan diri macam ni . Agak lama jugak he'd treat me like that . Last-last you know what had happened ? HATI SAYA DAH TAWAR . Hati saya yang selama ni sangat mencintai dan menyayanginya , semakin lama semakin tawar sebab layanan macam ni yang saya dapat . Kalau boleh , he's just ignore me like this .

Sakitnya hanya Tuhan sahaja yang tahu . Benda macam ni lah yang buat aku fobia sangat2 . Fobia nak mencuba untuk menerima seseorang dalam hidup saya . I know nothing is going to be perfect . But at least I'd make an effort on this . When things is going like this . MATI KUTU tau . What's on my mind is . I want to END UP this thing . I just want to be alone . I don't want to think too much . I can't . Nanti yang parah . Aku sendiri . I must save  myself . I'm sorry . Bukan nak kejam , but that's the reality . I HATE HEARTBROKEN .

Once I've fall for someone , I'll fall so hard . So please treat me well . But if you don't , then I'll move . That's me . You the one who create this situation . I'm just follow . I don't know what else should I do . I'm hurt enough . I think better we're remain be as a friend . Ok . 

END 

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~ G I F T ~

On last Wednesday , I'd hangout with my Chinese students . Hehe . They have arranged the appointment . So , I just follow only lor . 

First , we've our lunch at Noodle Taste . Hehe ! Boleyh tahan larh makanan kat situ . Nak tahu ape ? Dieowang yang spon aku mamam . Memang baik betul lah budak nie . Lepas mamam tu , kami berjalan2 disekitar East Coast Mall tu je . Sementara nak tunggu masa nak tengok wayang kan . Movie started at 3.20pm . Before tengok wayang tu , we all karaoke dulu . Hihi ! Sah2 lah aku kena nyanyi lagu Chinese & Korean dengan dieowang . Hehe ! Tak tahu nyanyi ? Bantaiiii je . At least , I've fun that day . Thanks alot students . I'm really appreciate it . 

Oh yeah . On the next day . You want to know what ? They've gave me a present .. Haaa ! Wanna cried lar me that day . Haha ! Serious . Sangat2 terharu . They've gave to many effort . Tersentuhnye .. Sebak dada nak tinggalkan mereka . Budak2 aku yang nakal dulu pun banyak yang dah berubah sikap since aku dah ajar dieowang . Ouh guy , I'm gonna miss you all . :(

Then ade segelintir budak2 Form 1 nieyh yang suka sangat kat aku . Siap bagi kad raya yang dieowang buat sendiri & beli . Then , siap bagi tandatangan seluruh kelas bagi kat aku . See ? Mana tak nye aku nak nangeh .. Huhuhu ! 

What's in inside ? Wanna know ?? Jeng Jeng Jeng ... >.<

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Do you ACCEPT me for who I am ?

Sometimes , Im just wanna be like a little kid again . Tak nak fikir pasal apa2 yang boleh menyakitkan hati aku . Nak bermain2 . Nak kena marah dengan mak . Nak dapat kiss dari mak . Tapi everything is alrite . Mak marah , mak pukul sampai nangis pun aku tak kesah sebab mak sayang aku . Bila dah besar macam ni , bila orang yang sayang ngan kita TAK sayang dah , hati sakit tau . Sakit tu tak sama macam bila mak marah . Sakit tu boleh buat kita kelam kabut . Buat kita rasa tak tenang pun .

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~ New Life Has Began ~

5th August 2011

I'll finally move on . :)

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~ D o n ' t K n o w ~

If he’s really loves me . He wouldn’t scared to admit his feeling . Thus , he’s also will admit me as his gurlfie . Nothing to be scare of right ? If you really sincerely loving someone , what you want to do is you want the world know she/he’s yours .

·       At first you would text me: “Goodnight :]”

·       It then turned into: “Goodnight! :D”

·       Soon, it became: “Goodnight (insert name) Love”

·       And sure enough, it turned into your voice saying: “Goodnight babe! I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

·       Then, soon, it turned into your voice saying: “Gnight.”

·       And then it went back to texts, saying: “Goodnight”

·       And finally, it made its way to: “Night.”

·       And now, you don’t even say anything to me anymore.

* Always happen :( *

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~ E M O T I O N A L ~

Maaf yuk . Emosi tak stabil 2 hari ni . Tu lah jiwang2 shaja rupa blog ni . Huhu ! Tak tahu nak luahkan kat siapa dah .. Better luah sorang2 kat sini kan . Lantak lah orang nak baca or what . Tak kisah lah orang tahu akan hidup peribadi aku .. Kepada sesiapa yang concern . Thanks ar . Kepada sesiapa yang cakap "Padan muka" tu , thanks gak ea .. :)  

I'm always said this to you . " I'm happy for you" . And it's the hardest and biggest LIE that I ever said . Mulut cakap lain tapi HATI kata lain . Mulut senyum tapi HATI menangis .

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Kenapa Aku Tak Leh Bahagia Macam Orang Lain ?

I'm HEARTBROKEN . I'M FEELING SO SAD . I MISS HIM . I DO LOVE HIM . Why must this happen huh ? Bila lah aku boleh bahagia macam orang lain ? Bila lah aku akan jumpa someone yang betul2 sayang kat aku ? Aku sendiri yang sakit now . Sakit sangat .. Tak suka akan perasaan ni .. :( Sangat2 tak suka perasaan yang hadir ini . Bahagia yang hadir tak selamanya . Sekejap je aku merasakan bahagia yang hadir . Bila dah bahagia , aku akan TERLUKA seperti sekarang . TERLUKA sangat2 . ;'( 

Lepas ni aku akan bergerak sendiri . Tak nak dah sayang2 kat orang . Hati sendiri yang sakit . Tak nak bagi harapan kat orang . Tak nak dah menagih harapan dari orang . Macam PEMINTA SEDEKAH je ! 

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What My Heart Want Is

I'm still want to be with you . To be loved with you again ..

Yeah , I did tried . But I can't make it . ;(

I thought I loved him, but he had to break my heart for me to know what true love really is

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19th / November ' 2010 - 19th / July ' 2011

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY 8th MONTHS . Tak sangka kan , 8 bulan ady I'm starting messaging with you . On this date (19th) , I'm OFFICIALLY letting you go from my life dear . ;) Setelah 8 bulan . I'm letting you go now . Hehe . And I hope I can make it . Don't worry about me . I'm doin fine with all of this . 19th - That's the start and the end of us . ;)

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Letih Jadi Seorang Manusia

Bukan tak bersyukur menjadi salah satu daripada ciptaanNya . Tapi kadang2 tu I'm feel so tired . Tired of everything . I think I can't bear with it . As a human , I'm so weak . Bila dah berjauhan daripada family macam ni terutamanya , I'm so weak . Tak tahu nak bertahan sampai bila . I'm feel like I want to end up my life just like this . ;( Nak jaga hati orang bukannya senang . Setiap yang kita buat tu , all is pretend . Tak suka lah kalau berlakon2 ni . Tapi nak buat macam mana kan , hati orang kita kena jaga . Tapi yang sedihnya , hati sendiri siapa nak jaga . Siapa nak peduli ? No one lah . Kalau ada pun sehari dua je . Then tak lagi . Manusia . lumrah dah begitu . 

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Saya nak Awak yang dulu Mr.Mardybum

I want you back ! I want you back ! I want you back ! Nak awak pukul 11.30pm message me like before . Rindu sangat kat awak . Rindu sangat nak bergurau dengan awak ! Rindu sangat nak dengar suara awak ! Rindu sangat nak tengok awal LIKE semua status saya ! Rindu sangat nak dengar Handphone saya memainkan lagu Mardybum . Sebab saya tahu awak message saya . Huh ~ Rindu semua tu . ;'( Sakitnya merindu . Nak diluahkan kat siapa ? No one . Takpa lah , biar saja saya seorang saja yang tahu and rasa semua tu . Awak dah tak macam dulu lagi dah . Now , awak just cari saya bila awak rasa awak betul2 perlukan saya . Awak dah tak rindu saya lagi dah . Awak dah tak sayang saya macam dulu lagi dah . Awak dah menjadi orang lain dah . Saya dah takda dalam hati awak lagi dah . Saya dah tak penting macam dulu lagi dah . Saya dah tak dapat nak CURI hati awak lagi dah . Saya sedih . 

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Tersedar Dari Lamunan ~

Baru semalam saya dapat berfikir dengan logik why all of this time he acted like that . Hurm . Semua cause of that girl . Bukan nak salahkan dia . Memang tak salah pun dia nak berkawan . And memang tak salah pun kalau PEREMPUAN tu nak marah . Sebab , saya interframe kat waktu yang salah . PADAN MUKA . Awak , jangan risaulah . Lepas ni , saya dah tak ganggu hidup DIA dengan awak . Both of you boleh back to normal lah . Sorry selama ni , saya banyak sangat mengganggu hidup awak berdua . I'm apologise . Thanks for everything . For me , cukup sudha . I don't want to bother your life anymore . I'll move on . 

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Let's move . I'm tired .

Now , it's time to forget you . I'm suppose to be not to get through hard time like this . But why must I ? Why can't I just live happily just like before ? Where's the happiness ? Where's the fairness ? Why must everytime I have to get through all of this pain ? Am I such a fool girl ? The girl that always getting flirt with guys ? 

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Suka & Tak Suka

DIA suka :

* Merajuk . Bila dia merajuk bukan sehari , kadang2 sampai 2 hari . Yang hari tu , dekat 2 minggu . Dia shakap DIA NAK LUPAKAN saya . Dulu bila dia merajuk , saya tak jemu nak memujuk dia . Ye lah . Dulu asyik saya je yang merajuk , then orang akan pujuk . Saya mana reti nak memujuk . Dia lah orang pertama yang saya pujuk . Hishh ~ Tapi dalam tak sedar , I'd learned something from him right ? :)

* makan ayam . He's favourite . 

*  Pengsan awal . Since dari 1st I'd messaged with him . Kalau dah over jam 12 , jangan harap nak message elok2 dengan dia . Around jam tu lah dia akan pengsan awal . Heh ! Mula2 agak tak dapat nak terima suasana tu , tapi bila dah lama2 ok lah . I'm fine with it . Kalau tengah2 message tu , dia tak reply lagi . Then , I'm off too . Heh ! 

* BERGAYA . For me lah . Even dia just pakai shirt je . Memang he's look cool . That's why I'm fall for him . ;) The way he dressed up . Cool .. 

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It's all about ME and Mr.Papa

So the true . We must always remember this . No matter how hard our life was , it's happen for the reason . Tuhan sengaja nak berikan cabaran dan dugaan di dalam hidup kita . Takkan dia asyik nak bagikan kesenangan kepada kita , am I right ? 

Sometimes , kita tak boleh nak lari daripada kenyataan yang amat menyakitkan . Kita harus terima setiap kesakitan itu . Kesakitan tu lah yang akan mematangkan kita untuk meneruskan kehidupan di dunia sementara ini . 

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My heart says that I Love You

Love Comments

No matter how hard I'm trying to avoiding you . I'm still love you . No matter angry am I , I'm still love you . No matter everytime when I'm think about negative things , I'm still love you .

Love Comments

Although handphone dah rosak , tapi I'm still trying my best to read out all of your messages . Before tidur , that's my routine . Read all of your messages . Our memories will never fade away . Like what I did mentioned before . If we're not apart like what we used to be now . I'll keep your memories with me . Not anywhere , but in my heart . 

Banyak sangat dugaan bila kita betul2 jatuh cinta kat orang kan . Kita sanggup berkorban . Yah . BERKORBAN . Sakit bila pengorbanan tu kite yang tanggung , hanya Tuhan je yang tahu . Memang betul . Kita teman tapi mesra right ? We can't forcing to make it more than a friend . I know that . It's never gonna be happen . I'm trying my best to telling myself it's never gonna be happen . Yes . NEVER . ;( Huh . Bila terkenangkan perkara tu , I'm feel so down . Entahlah . Me also don't know why must I falling so hard with you . Huh . Sakit ar . ;( Unlike this kind of feeling . 

Mr.Mardybum . Papa . Mr.Cupcakes .

Love Comments

Love Comments

I'll wait patiently until your heart open for me AGAIN .

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OUT !

I WON'T CRY FOR YOU ANYMORE ! I WON'T WASTING MY TEARS FOR THE PERSON WHO DOESN'T DESERVED FOR IT . YOU REALLY MAKE ME FEEL SO DOWN . YOU'VE KILL MY FEELING . CONGRATS !

Before this you'd mentioned that . You try to FORGET ME . You know how hurt I am ? It's hurt so much . It's killing me . Tapi saya pura2 ketawa . Pura2 kata OK . Sedangkan I'M NOT OK ! Now , maybe it's the time for you to forget me . YES ! FORGET THE PERSON NAME MARGARETH ANAK NANGKAI . ERASE her name in your memory . Throw her away from your life . It's better . It'll not only good for your sake , but ot's also good for her . Biar MARGARETH tak berharap kat awak lagi . MENANGIS . Sakit sangat bila orang buat macam tu dengan kita . Sangat sakit . Huh ~ Tak tahan dah . *crying* . Out !
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Cerita Margareth Hari Ini ( 6th July 2011 )

1. OBSERVATION 

Today is the 2nd time for my observation by Pn.Rohemah . Nervous tu tak yah ar nak cakap kan . Memang tak pernah habis . Since kelmarin aku asyik tanye kat Pn.Rohemah .. "Cikgu just observe tok SET INDUKSI je kan ? " Hehe ! Even aku ajar 2 masa . Tapi aku asyik tanye bende yang sama . Nasiblah Pn.Rohemah ni jenis yang sabar melayani kerenah aku . Keke ! Overall ok . Pn.Rohemah memang baik . Just sometimes I'm feel so down . I got no confident to teaching today . I don't know why . Maybe because aku tak berjaya menguasai tentang topik yang aku observe tadi tu kot . Today ajar 3 buah kelas . So , kelas 2 Dinamik akan diajar topik yang sama dengan kelas 2 Bijak . Pn.Rohemah observe kelas 2B . Huh , aku try larh nak praktiskan kat kelas 2D . Tapi takde confident tu . Memang down lah tadi .. Huh ! Tapi lepas je habis observation tu , LEGA giler2 gua cakap babe . Thanks to Pn.Rohemah cause memberikan banyak tunjuk ajar and be a sporting mentor to me .. Muahh ! Loph u Pn.Rohemah . ;)

2. HEART

 

It's all about my feeling again . Boring kan ? Haha ! Tapi apa boleyh buat . I just express my feeling here . Okai . Sometimes , bila happy . Aku sangat happy . Bila sedih , aku akan sesedih-sedihnya . TERKILAN pun ada . Ye lah . Benda tu , memang nothing . To someone that I love the most . I really love you . Thousand times I did mention the same thing right . Tak muak . Tak pernah jemu waiting for you . Entahlah . Nak cari orang lain boleyh tak ? Kadang2 bila awak dah layan , I'm feel so happy . Just nak be with you je . 24hrs message sampai kamoo naik rimas . But what can I do . Kalau orang dah tak nak layan . Takkan kita nak terhegeh2 kejar pulak kan . So , kena terima hakikat bahawa . YOU'RE NOT MINE . AND NEVER BE MINE . We are friends . Not more than that . I know you never LOVE me . NEVER . Kalau awak sayang saya . Mesti awak dan saya dah jadi COUPLE now kan ? But ... Until now , it's still the same . Nothing different right ? Shaya just menunggu something yang tak akan berlaku pun . Bukan yang tak pasti . Yang tak akan berlaku . Saya je yang lebih2 . Berangan yang awak dan saya akan menjadi COUPLE . Bodohnya saya .. Yah . I'm very stupid . Maybe awak dah ada orang lain di hati awak . Saya just PARASIT dan PENGGANGGU je .. Maaf , saya terlalu cintakan awak . Huh ! Sedihnya .. Nak menangis .. Can I cry ? Thank You . 

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~ Maaf , Hati saya sudah Tertutup ~

SEAIRA AWIE .. Maaf dude , I can't love you like before . Ratusan kali dah awak tanye . Why do I can't fall for you again . It's because , you're my friend . Hati & cinta saya BUKAN tok awak lagi dah . My heart still belonging to Mr.Mardybum . Walaupun he didn't love me like I do . It's doesn't matter . As long as I know I love him . Seaira , antara kita tak lebih dari seorang kawan dah sekarang ni . Hope you understand . Dulu , mase kapel . Awak tak jaga hati saye betol2 . Now , awak menagih balik . Sori , I'm not interested anymore . -.-' .

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Happy 7th Months Anniversary

Mr.Mardybum . Tak terase dah kan . 1/2 year already since I knew you . Actually , more than that . Just that one was , since I'm start texting with you . I count every single day . Like what I did said before . I don't want to lost any moments with you . :)

Although now , we're not together anymore . But , you're still in my mind and my heart . I'll remember this date . 

Happy 7th Months Anniversary Mr.Papa :)

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CINTA .. Saya TERLUKA :(

CINTA .. Entahlah . Tak tahu nak describe perasaan sekarang ni . SAYA TERLUKA . SAKIT sangat rasa tu . Selalu je cakap , I'll move on . Tapi tak move juge . So hurt . Damn hurt . Sampaikan demam cause of this thing . I don't want to thing too much . But how could I ? Every single day . Every single hours . Every single minutes . What all I can do is .. Thinking of you . Damn ! Why must I to be choose to face all of this thing ? I'm weak . Too weak to face it . ;( 

Wish that I could turn back the time . Where's I didn't knowing you before . It's better that I'm stick single . My heart was not taken by anyone . Just taken by my lovely mom . I can't make thing right as I want to . I'm accidently falling for you . How can I stop that . It's all about my feeling . I can't control it . Just .. It's my biggest mistake for falling for you I think . I should be not bothered your life . Never ever disturbed it . It was my mistake .

I'm pretend like I'm too familiar with what it feels like to hurt . I'm always says that I'm used to all of this thing . But inside my heart , I'm TOTALLY broken into pieces . No one can fix it . NO ONE . 

LOVE , don't ever say "I LOVE YOU" if you're going to leave me . And the most important is . DON'T ever mentioned that word if you're going to LEAVE ME ALONE . That's word is killing me in silence .

But all I can do now is accept the truth . Cause I know the past cannot be changed , forgotten , edited or erased . It can be only accepted . So true . 

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Wondering

Why this gonna be happen huh ? Why must I still hoping for the things that NEVER be mine ? Everyday , every night before I go to sleep . I’ll hug your shirt . Hug my teddy . Cause you always said that you’re my teddy . I hug them and pray . I did pray . I ask from Lord that you’ll be alright . Stay healthy . Wish for you happiness . Wish that you’ll be back as my Papa someday . Yes , I did . I did pray for something that never be happen again . Worthless . I’m so tired now . I’m scare that I can’t wait anymore . If it’s a good news for you , ok . J I think it’s the suit time for letting you go . No one will hurt . I don’t want to hurting you anymore . L I should let you go dear . *crying*

You can ignoring me , but it's killing me in silent . It’s always me who’s care to much right ? Soke , I got reason for that . But you ? Do you ever care ? I don’t think so . Yeah , who am I ? I’m nothing to you . Seems like .. I’m just bertepuk sebelah tangan saja . Soke lah .. What to do , dah nasib macam ni kan . Rindu kat orang yang mungkin tak rindu kat kite . Sayang kat orang yang tak pernah sayang kat kite . Cinta kat orang yang tak pernah cinta kat kite . Dahlah , makin banyak melalut . Makin sedih nanti . Dahlah tengah hujan . Layan pulak lagu sedih … L

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Sebuah Kisah Aku dan Kamoo

Mase Sem 2 lagi , aku dah minat kat Kamoo . Masa tu , tengah bergosip-gosip dengan housemate pasal lelaki paling hensem kat UPSI . Haha ~ Gilakk keja . Then , sorang2 lah bantai citer . Mase tu aku minat kat senior Sarawak cause senior tu jaga masa minggu orientasi tok kolej aku (KAB) . Hensem gak . Haha ~ Then sampai je kat YUK (Roomate) , dia cakap .. "Korang tak tengok lagi mamat sorank ni . Masa dia jaga kolej aku minggu orientasi kolej (KUO) , cair kot aku tengok dia . Aku gerenti kalau korang tengok mesti korang will fall for him ." . Bahaha ! Siot . Aku terus terpengaruh dengan cerita si Yuk tu . Ape lagi . Dah si Yuk bagi full name , aku ngan member2 lain terus je cari siapa mamat tu . Gilakk miang kan ?? Hahaha ~ Memang miang ! Wink2 ..

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Thank You

1. God

Thanks to God cause giving the strength and beautiful life to me . I'm always believe that God always giving the best for me . Even though sometimes I'm feel so down , I know God must have some reasons for that .  God has created my life story , my love story , my happiness . HE IS THE WAY , THE TRUTH AND THE LIFE . HE won't leave me . I know that . NEVER .

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Thank You For Hurting Me XD

Thank you so much dear . Thank you . I don't know what else I could say . I'm hurt too much now . Too much . *crying while writing this* .. Huh ~ I try to smile . But I can't . My tears is run so fast . I can't bear with all of this thing . I'm too weak . I'd told so . So weak . It's nothing special anymore . 


Everything seems to be worst . I need to accept the truth now . He's not mine . Not longer mine . I'm get so jealous right now . I'm so sorry . I can't control myself anymore . I gotta go with my own way now . I should let you go . Even though we want to be like before , I think it's doesn't work . It can't be happen . Your heart is belong to her . You're stay in her heart dear . Not longer in mine . I can fill it . Although you've said " Kalau she is my jodoh , we're mean to be together . " Yes she is .    
I think it's the right time for me to move on . If not , I'll gettin so hurt . Sebab , I'm in love with you . Not you heart anymore . I don't want it . I want to fall for your heart . That's the most important . I want to win your heart . I want to steal your heart . That's all . 
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Do I Have Any Reason To Fall In Love With You ?

" Our heart is the greatest cheater in the world . It makes thousands of different excuses to stay in touch with the people we Love "

Do I ? Even though a million times if you ask me the same question , why do I fall for you . My answer will be the same . I LOVE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE . And I think I don't need any answer for your question dear . 

My heart for you is never change . It's always the same . I'm the one who's admire you . I'm the one who's seek for your love . I'm the one who's always care for you . I'm the one who's always by your side . I'm the one always LOVING YOU . I'm the one who's desire you . 

Sometimes , I don't think you're really care at all . Because I know , you're not the old you . You're the new person that I'd knew . Do you know how much I wish I could be fall for the person who's really make me fall in love like before ? That's the old you . The old my Mr.Mardybum . The one who's always be my side . The one who's always care for me . The one who's always make me laugh . The one who's always make me smile all the time . The one who's become a poison and a drug who's always makes me addicted to . Honestly , I'm really miss the old you . 

No one understands the silence between my words . No one understands the sadness behind my smile . No one understands the unsaid feelings of mine . They think I am fine but only I know daily I am dying . I want to be happy again . I want to live those moments again . I am sick of wearing a fake smile . I am waiting for the one who can really make me smile . And I know , just and only . Mr.Mardybum is that person . ;'(

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Ikhlas ke Awak Sayang Kat Saya ?

Ouh really ? Are you sincere in loving me ? Please don't play with my heart ok . Baby , you give me too much hope sometimes . And , I'm hoping too much . Seriously . 

Big girl don't cry right ? But I can't . I must cry on . Entahlah . I'm think too much now . Maybe , crying is the best way to express my feeling .  No one knows how I'm feel . No one cares .

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It's So Hard To Forget Someone Who Gave You So Much To Remember

Yeahh .. Aku mengesyokkan diri aku sendiri lah . Semakin hari semakin aku syok sendiri . Hurm . Ada baik and ada buruk . Ye ek ? Tak tahu . That's what I'm think about . Entahlah , aku rasa better I'm keep on silent . That's the best and better way . Macam before ni kan . Tak ganggu hidup DIA . DIA pun tak ganggu gak . 

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Kita bukan aku dan kamu yang dulu lagi dah ... :)

Mencari dan terus mencari . Di mana ? Ke mana ? Menghilang entah ke mana .. Ngee ~ Entahlah apa aku nak tulis nie . Aku ikut rentak hati dan tangan yang rancak menaip . Macam main piano larh pulak kan .. Heh . Al-maklum lah kan . Nak belajar main piano pulak lepas ni . Heh ~ Konon .. :)

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Little things mean a lot

True . A little things mean a lot . It's happen to anyone of us . Everyone are feel the same thing right ? No matter what had happened to us . It's really bring a lot of changes . Even though it's a small matter , but it's mean a lot . 

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Aishiteru Mardybum

Heh ~ Entah kenape mood aku leh happy plak arinie . Happy sangat2 . Salunya , before tidur pasti aku akan bertemankan air mata . But tonight , I'm feel so happy . Don't know why . Tak kira aku tengah happy ke . Tengah bersedih ke . Yang pasti . HE's always in my mind . ;)

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Memory Remains II

* .. hehe..2 laa..1st tyme jmpe, dnga sore ..
* ..huhu..yep..dnga sore pon, da jdik tndu kan ..
* .. hehe..ye eh...sy pon..awk, malunye..sy kan gune beg awk, td lalu sblh mmber awk..aiyaakk..
* huhu . hate sewing ..
* ..hehe..de plak no hdu..mo kis la . lalala ~
* Huhu ..xmoo tdo dah..mish u la ..
* Yeke..emm, sy xwtpe..mkn cupcke..hehe ..
* ..huhu..emm,sy da mam 10bjik..knyg..hehe..
* ..xmo..huu ~,,missing sum1..
* huhu~ ..bling laa..emm..ngah text la neh..die jaohh ..
* huhu..xkne2..week..emm,jaoh..kat miri sne wak..
* huhu..yelah..t tkot xdpt jmpe die ..
* ..yeppp..huhu..adei..tringat die je neyh..how ?..
* ..huk3 ..nseb jgk sy bg no fon..awk bkn nk mntk...
* ..xponn..hehe..emm,xdela..teddy tggl tm..yg pluk 2 kt Miri..
* hehe...emm..wak,cni jap..nk bisik kt tlinge awk..
* ..hahahha ..muuahhhh...sje, nk kis pp awk . lalaa ~
* ...hehe..awk kne tpuu..merah muke 2...
* ..hehe..tp sy leh imgne mke awk merah,n mesti ngah senyum2 ..
* hahhaa ..of cos i can...mmuahh..see..
*..haha . yess ..i got it ..
* ..hak3...so i can kiss u many times la kn ..
* hehe..okes, t sy g sane awk mst bwk sy jejalan..
*..erkk...ye2..jln..awk 2 je mrangkak ..haha ~
* hohoho..xmo2..tgok awk je .lalalala ~
* ... my mardybum (31/11/2010 :: 2253)


*nanti2 saya update lagi ok . Ngantok . Thus , tak tahan nak update . Menangis tak henti2 . ! Too many memories about me and HIM . Huh ! Dugaan betul lah . Mish him sow sudden . ~
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Takdir Tuhan , Tak Siapa Yang Mampu Mengubahnya

Baik . Entry kali ni . "Takdir Tuhan Tak Siapa Yang Mampu Mengubahnya" . That's right . Everything had happened , there must be a reason . Aku salu gak percaya . Yah , yang berlaku mesti ada hikmahnya .

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Entahlah

Kadang kala , awak buat saya rasa seperti saya ni diperlukan sangat2 . Dihargai sangat2 . Tapi kadang2 awak buat saya rasakan yang saya ni , PERASAN sangat2 . Still berharap kat something yang SUDAH PASTI . Kenyataan yang benar . Bukan nak salahkan awak . Tapi . Entahlah . Jawapan kepada semua soalan . ENTAHLAH . Lebih baik saya bawa haluan sendiri lepas ni .

Just now , I've conversation with mom . Nangis tak henti2 saya . Mom asked me why I'm cried so much . Tapi , silent is better . Banyak berdolah dalih dengan mom just now . Mom , I'm sorry . I'm just nit yur shoulder to cry it out . Tak tahan dah mak . Sakit ... ;'(
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Kenapa Nak Sedih ?

Hah ~ Nape nak sedih ni . Takde pape pun nak disedihkan kan MArgareth . Be cool babe ! Cool !!!! Damn . Tak suke betul dengan keadaan macam ni . Seharian ok je . Tiba2 tak ok plak dah . Huh ~ Better deactive terus . Biar tak tahu apa2 lagi . Asyik nak bersedih je . Asik nak menangis je . Suke sangat membazir air mata awak tu for something that ... Nonsense ! Errrggggggggggggggggggggggggggghh ~ Dah lahhh . Spoilt my mud betul ! Huh ~ Tiba2 teringat kat DIa . Entahlahh . Rasa nak message DIa . RAsa nak Kolling DIa . Tapiii .. Apa hak aku ? Tak pe larhhh .. Let it be like tat .. Out ~
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Maaf Sebab Saya Tak Dapat Nak Lupakan Awak

Heh . Takde keje now . Just relaks2 je . So , update lagi lah ok . Saje je nak buang bosan and nak lelapkan mata . Tadi , chat dengan si DIA sekejap . Terubat gak rindu kat DIA . Huhu . Now , baru lepas belek2 chatbox between me and HIM . Hehe .. Agak lucu disitu . Ade yang part manje2 . Ade gak part bile dah bergaduh . Hehehe ~Really mish all of that you know .

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Selamat Hari Gawai 2011

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaa ~ Nyak ea bulih . Selamat Hari Gawai ! 1hb June merupakan tarikh yang sangat bermakna buat semua kaum Dayak di seluruh Sarawak . Begitu jugak dengan rakyat di Sabah , hari ini merupakan Pesta Keamatan mereka . Jadi , 1hb dan 2hb June merupakan hari kebesaran bagi masyarakat peribumi Sarawak dan Sabah . 

Tadi tolong mak memasak . Memang penat giler ar . Memanggang ayam pun aku gak tadi . Nasib tak hangoss . Hahaha ~ Just now , tulis2 ciket . Sementara menantikan detik 12 tengah malam . Nak ngirup ai pengayu (tuak) . Heh ~ Mak dah bagi green light . So , tak sabar nak pegi ngabang besok .. Hehe ~ :) 

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Praktikal di Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Tengku Afzan Part II

Ok , hari ni aku update lagi blog tentang praktikal aku di SMK Tengku Afzan . Haha ~ Seronok jugak kongsi cerita and pengalaman mengajar ni kan .. 

Ok , hari ni Rabu kan . So , dalam jadual aku mengajar 3 kelas hari ni . 2 masa tok kelas 2 Bijak , 1 masa tok kelas 2 Jaya dan 2 masa lagi tok kelas 2 Dinamik . 2 masa pertama aku masuk kelas 2 Dinamik . Kelas tu memang cool . Hari ni aku buat aktiviti dengan dieowang .

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Memory Remains

Kenangan SMS antara kite .. Part 1 

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Happy Teacher's Day __ Selamat Hari Guru

GURU PENJANA TRANSFORMASI PENDIDIKAN NEGARA

Wahh .. 16 Mei 2011 . Hari ni merupakan Hari Guru ! SELAMAT HARI GURU kepada semua guru-guru di Malaysia . Kepada guru yang telah mendidik saya selama ni , tak pernah mengenal erti jemu dan putus asa demi melihat anak didiknya berjaya di dalam hidup . Terima kasih banyak-banyak kerana telah mendidik saya dengan baik . Dari guru tadika sehingga ke guru yang mengajar saya semasa di Tingkatan 6 . Ramai sangat . Yang telah menurunkan ilmu mereka kepada saya . Heh ~ Dan tak lupa juga kepada Pensyarah di UPSI . Terima kasih kerana telah mendidik saya sehingga kini . Walaupun tempoh pengajian tak tamat lagi , TERIMA KASIH jugak ! heh .. 

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It's Time To Forget

 

I WILL NOT WAIT FOR YOU ANYMORE . I WILL FORGET YOU .

Dulu , bukan main lagi saye memuji awak . Bukan main lagi saye menyayangi awak . Tapi sekarang . Semua tu dah tak bermakna lagi dah . Saye dah tahu semuanya . Sebab dah saye dah rase awak takkan layan saye lagi . Takkan sayang kat saye lagi . Tak macam dulu lagi dah . Awak dah balik kepada akak tu . Tak payah lah saye nak mentionkan ye . 

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Hatiku Luka Lagi

Entah lah . Sekarang ni langsung tak bercontact with each others . Almost a week already . Sakitnya hanya Tuhan je yang tahu . Aku just mampu berdoa . Berdoa agar Tuhan memberikan aku kekuatan untuk mengharungi semua ni . Berdoa agar Tuhan memberikan aku petunjuk agar aku dapat menghadapi semua ini dengan tenang . Setenang yang mungkin . Andai kata Tuhan tunjukkan aku bahawa aku perlu menerima perpisahan ini , aku redha . Apa yang penting sekarang , aku harus berfikir . 

TUHAN SEDANG MENGUJI AKU

 Itu je yang termampu aku fikirkan . 

Saye tak tahu ape punca awak buat saye macam ni . Saye langsung tak berkesempatan nak tahu semua jawapan . Saye tak tahu di mana salah silapnye . Awak buat saye macam ni , sakit sangat tau tak awak ? Ouh lupe . Awak mungkin tak tahu . 

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Praktikal di Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Tengku Afzan

Starting from 9th May' 2011 , aku dah start menjalani sesi praktikal di sekolah yang aku pilih - Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Tengku Afzan . Sekolah ni merupakan sekolah perempuan . Tapi , segelintir murid tak seperti perempuan pun . Hahaha ~ 

1st day aku pergi ke Kuantan is on 4th May' 2011 . Masa tu , memang aku tak nak pergi pun . Sehari sebelum keberangkatan aku ke sini , aku menangis sepanjang hari . Rasa tak tenang menyelubungi diri . Maybe takut nak face praktikal , face the new environment kot . Maybe . Tak tahu sebabnye . Tapi bila dah sampai kat sini , agak ok lah . Jiran sebelah (owner rumah sewa ni) , pun ok jugak . Indian . Walaupun nampak strict , tapi overall , memang ok . Hope will be ok sampai aku habis praktikal kat sini lah ye . ;)


Aku dan si Steff ni mula melaporkan diri di SMK Tengku Afzan , last Friday (6th May' 2011) . Mula-mula tengok keadaan sekolah , memang biasa je . Lagi ok sekolah kat tempat sendiri . 5 stars gitu . Haha ~ Bilik guru kecil je . Kalau dibandingkan dengan bilik guru di sekolah sendiri , memang 3x ganda kot lebih besar daripada bilik guru di sekolah disini . Huhu . Pergi ke sekolah , jumpa dengan Penolong Kanan Pentadbiran - Encik Mohd Najib cause mase tu Pengetua tengah on cuti . Cuti sakit . Nak tahu siapa Pengetua sekolah tu ??? Haa ~ Mase aku 1st tahu pun aku memang agak takut dan cuak plus terkejut . Haha ~ Ye lah ,

Pengetua sekolah Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Tengku Afzan ialah ISTERI MENTERI BESAR PAHANG - DATIN SERI DIRAJA DATO' HAJAH JUNAINI BTE KASSIM .

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God Is Writing My Love Story

Now is 1.22am . Tapi mata tak nak tidur . Lapar sebenonye . Hik3 ~ Habis 1 paket keropok aku hentam tadi . Al maklumlah , since morning tak makan . Terketar-ketar tangan ni ha . Still terasa lapar lagi . Takpe2 . 

Huh ~ Selalu gelisah hati aku ni . Aku tak tahu lah macam mana nak ubat . Puas aku berfikir positif . I think positive as I can . But I can't . What if I'm just let him go ? Tapi , sanggupkah aku ? Sometimes , I wanna tell him that I wanna let him go . Because , orang cakap .. 

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Miss the old of you

Hari ini , entry aku lagi berkenaan dengan hati dan perasaan . Bila bercakap soal hati dan perasaan ni , memang aku lemah . Apa yang aku tengah rasakan sekarang ni , kosong . Empty . Langsung takde perasaan . Walaupun pada saat ini aku tengah merindui dia . Tengah merindui dia . Dan tengah merindui dia . Aku tak tahu lah macam mana nak describe perasaan rindu aku tu . Tak tertanggung rasanya . Kadang-kadang , I'm asking myself . Do he miss me like I do ? 

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The Royal Wedding - 29th April ' 2011

Today is the big day for Prince William and Princess Kate Middleton . Hari berbahagia dieowang . Hari perkahwinan kerabat diraja . Fuh . Dah lah hari aku last exam . Memang syiok . Time exam tadi . Dalam otak just set nak tengok wedding dieowang je . Tak fokus pun time exam tadi . Huhuh ~ Ingatkan tak sempat . Kan semalam tengok kat google , dieowang cakap wedding tu live kat NTV7 kol 3pm . Clash pulak dengan time aku exam . Top2 mase balik tadi , baru je bermula wedding tu . Ape lagi , aku g dok tengok kat tempat Steff keje lah . Hoo ~ 

Mase aku mule2 sebelum turun exam , aku sempat lah view wedding Prince Charles dengan mendiang Lady Diana dulu . Memang gempaQ lah . Wedding dress die memang panjang . Tadi tengok wedding dress Princess Kate tak lah sepanjang wedding dress Lady Diana dulu . Prince William dan Princess Kate telah berkahwin di gereja yang sama dengan Prince Charles dan Lady Diana dulu . Memang besar memang cantik lah gereja tu . Lepas tu , tengok perarakan mereka pula . Bukan perarakan tapi mostly macam , tempat untuk berjumpa dengan rakyat jelata . Dieorang lambai dari istana . Rakyat yang datang memang ramai . Macam semut . Ramai giler .. Huishh ~ Dasyat .. Lepas tu dieowang kissing . Huhu ~ Romantik nye . 

Ape2 pun , hope hubungan dieowang akan berkekalan hingga ke anak cucu . Diharapkan agar Prince William tidak akan mengikuti jejak langkah ayahandanya yang nak kahwin untuk kali kedua . Then menduakan Lady Diana . Hope die akan menjage PRincess Kate dengan sebaiknya . Amen .

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New Movies

Mari Kita Terjah Panggung ;)


1. TRANSFOMERS 3 : DARK OF THE MOON

- Wahh .. Tak sabar menunggu kemunculan filem ni . Sambungan daripada Transfomers 1 & 2 . Mesti gempaq . Aishhh .. Jom kite serbu panggung ramai2 . Takut pulak nanti takde mase nak g tonton .. Adedeh -.-' .

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S . I . N . G . A. P . O . R . E

Tepat jam 9am tadi , si Bumbum aku kol . " Morning aunty , what are you doin ? " Then aku jawab lah masih tidur kan . Then die cakap " Eww , wake up ! Wake up ! Wake up ! " . Dengan rasa malasnye aku merenggangkan seluruh urat badan aku . Baru aku bangun . Hehe ~ Then aku tanye lah si Bumbum nak ape .. Then die tanye .. " Aunty , how to spell SINGAPORE ? " . I'm a bit weird lah . Ape lah si Bumbum aku buat nieyh . Then I'm asked her , nak buat ape kan . She said that die ngan surfing internet . Facebook . Then , I said " Ask your momi lah search it for you" . Cuz die taip2 tapi tak dapat . Then die cakap mami takde . Keje . Then aku tanye balik , sape online dengan die . Die cakap die online dengan Granny . Erkkk ~ Hahaha ! Adedededhh .. Tergelak aku . Since bile pulak mak aku nie pandai men internet ? Celik IT larh pulak . Hahaha ! Pasti internet dieorang berdua tak berCONNECT tu . Tu yang tak tembus2 nak cari Singapore tu . Hahaha ! Aduii . Cucu yang berusia 7 tahun melayari sesawang dengan Granny . Maju mak aku eyh ... *mode lucu* . Masih lagi nak tergelak ni . Terkenangkan telatah dieorang berdua . Haishh . Macam-macam .

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Pertama Kali

Nasi Goreng USA 

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Perkahwinan Kerabat Diraja - Prince William & Kate Middleston-

 

Kate Middleton

Prince Willian & Kate Middleton

Tak sabar rasanye nak tengok perkahwinan ala-ala Cinderella ni . Ye lah , Kate Middleton kan terdiri daripada rakyat biasa . Kahwin pula dengan Kerabat Diraja Royal London of Wales - Prince William . Memang kehidupan fairytale yang akan menjadi realiti kot . Hehoo ~

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~ A Letter From Mom aNd Dad ~

My child,

when I get old, I hope you understand and have patience with me.

In case I break a plate, or spill soup on the table. Because I lost my eyesight. I hope you don't yell at me.

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Anugerah Bintang Popular Berita Harian 2010

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He took My heart away ‎♥

Hari ni . Seronok sangat-sangat malam ni dapat bermesej dengan My baby . Macam first2 bermesej dulu . Dia memang romantik . Romantik dan romantik . Like banyak2 . ;)

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I Will Remember This

~ Never cared for what they do 




Never 

cared for what they know ~

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Pendaftaran Kursus Semester 8

Dari hari tu dah huhahuha pasal add course tok Kemahiran Hidup ni . Ye lah . Asalkan hari tu dah buka course tok register , budak2 mula lah duduk tercongok kat depan lappy . Berebut nak daftar kursus . Al-maklum lah kan , line slow . Memang setiap kali add course every semester , mula lah line internet slow . Lembap macam kura-kura . Kadang - kadang tu sampai cakap " webpage are not available " . Hampeh ! Kena tekan F5 berulang kali . Aduii . Dugaan betul . Yang paling kesian macam last semester . Ada yang sampai tak sempat nak add 1 pun . Kena bawak g pihak akademik suruh bukak balik course tu . Dah lah masa tu last-last semester . Budak-budak pun nak balik kampung kan . Haha ~ Memang serbu gila-gila lah kalau dah terkenangkan kes add kursus ni . Huhu ~

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A . B . C

Hari ini aku tidur agak lewat sikit . Ye lah . Nak siapkan Buku Landskap yang sangat menimbulkan KEBENCIAN kepada aku .

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